So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I don't think brook has ever known best
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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