i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
