wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
