i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Sext me about skeletons
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
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