Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
