God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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