Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
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