i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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