Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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