As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
