Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Come on in and take your pants off
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