rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize