check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
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