When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
