i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
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