He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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