is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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