Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
