Whod you bang
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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