i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
