i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
