Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize