I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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