The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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