so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize