who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
