Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Randomize
