The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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