I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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