I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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