Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
