woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
