Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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