he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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