I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
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