Ambien. No doubt about it.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize