Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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