maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
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