READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize