I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I want to be your penis for a week.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
