Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
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