spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
