Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
