I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
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