theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
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