How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Randomize