WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Randomize