That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
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