Me. At least after what I've been through.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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