When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
